Saturday, October 10, 2015

To the 12 year old me!

Dear 12 year old Aliza
     Today is short so enjoy it. Not everything is easy in life but know you are safe you are loved and you will make it through middle school. You are going to have some of the hardest days of your life in middle school most of your classmates will not have a clue what you are going through let alone your teachers.
    One day you will want to do nothing more than read a good novel, yes I said novel, I know that three pages in life science seems like it takes all day. Todays struggled will look so simple, not because life is hard, but because you persevered. Many people will tell you, you can't but you can and you will.
    Spend time with the people that are close, it will not be guaranteed that they will be here tomorrow. I don't want to share to much I just want you to know that you need to enjoy Mandy's laugh. Record grandma and grandpas stories, they will not be able to share all of them with your kids.
    Don't waist your time with the girls that think they are better than you because God has a great plan for you that is down a long hard road. In the end what happens at school means very little in your life. The only thing you can do is be kind to others each day, it is their choice to do as they wish and you are stronger than they will know.  You will learn a lot from your relationship in high school but don't let them take you away from missing out on what you believe is right for you to keep you mind and body healthy.
     Trust only those that truly believe in you and don't let anyone say you can't accomplish your dream to share the love of Christ with others. You will have a great way of Sharing even if you don't learn Hebrew or Greek. There are false witness out there be aware of how satin uses them even when you are young.
     Best of all love life even though it gets hard. In 20 years you will be married for 13 years and have 3 amazing kids. God has provided in ways you never imagined. Its not easy but you are loved and safe. 
With all my love,
 The 32year old  you

Friday, October 2, 2015


Adam and Eve!! Wow the true picture of marriage.  Well we as wives are supposed to be helpers we try to take over the world.  In the process I think our culture has lost what God intended us to be. Adam was to be the protector of Eve but even in the beginning he let her persuaded him to the wrong thing.  Sometimes I feel like we wives are like this but I also look back and think  that my husband was supposed to stand up and protect us from this or that. On the other hand when I need him to protect me and make sure I am safe he is not there. Did I miss the mark completely?
    My husband spends anywhere from 7 to 12 weeks away from home a year. Some of you think that's no big deal. You are a single mom or a military wife or something along those lines with 90%of the year home without a spouse there. To you I say WOW I know I could do any of that. On the other hand I have friends that complain if their spouse is 20mins late once a month.  Why is it as women that we are wired most of us to have our spouse there with us?
  God is our protection right? But did he not make marriage in the image of himself and the church? He the bride groom and us the church the bride? How would the church function if we pulled God out 4weeks a year or more? Not well that is not how we are ment to be. I think that along the way the meaning and function of the roles have gone amiss.  I really am not that up on this at this time and should have done more research but if I am wrong on the biblical views of husband and wife as it was written I challenge you to correct me this means looking back at the text of the bible king James version or another traditional version to see.
  I challenge the men to lead with protection and love as the number one matter in marriage because then the wife is going to follow with respect and honor.  God is the head of the church but he also is the loving protection for her. I never see where he beats her physically or emotionally, I don't see how he turns his back on her when he sacrificed his son to save her. I do however see how he brought her back out of sin with love when Jesus went to the woman at the well. When he provides for Job when he had given up everything.  And many more.places so that brings me to the next thing on my mind.
     Are you willing to give up everything including your pride for what is right?  I had to give up a job I loved this past month to make a stand for what I believed was right it was not easy and still I play in my mind if I would have stayed it may have been better and even with my leaving for what I hope would open the eyes of some people may not have been noticed as that being the reason.  I feel that I took a hit to my pride as some have told me to just deal with it and others have agreed that hopefully eyes will be opened.  When you put two weeks in at a job you love it does take a hit to your pride but when we do it for the ones closest to us because the effects of the job are so hard on you and you bring it home you realize that it was only selfish pride anyway.
  So why do we so often chose pride over protection?  I think because very few notice the effects of protection. The protection comes most of the time with a smaller pay check. The jobs that keep us busy away from family and are more stress often get more money and our culture has put the price tag on the things that make us feel proud in front of our friends. Because no longer is there pride in a marriage it's replaceable in less than a few months.  It seems even our children's behavior is something we take pride in any more. I caught myself the other day responding to a wonderful complaint about my daughter with "You didn't see her at home last night" Really my kids are great for what they deal with from me.
  This week try to remember that protection for our families is much more than a roof over their heads it is the protection of the heart issues are they feeling loved safe and cared for.

Lord I lift these readers and their homes up to you right now that you will bless them and help them to remember that first and for most we are to protect ourselves and those around us from the temptations of saint. We ask your guidance and love as we know the closer we follow the harder he tries to distract us from you true protection.
In Jesus name Aman

Monday, September 28, 2015

A different plan than my own!

  I had a plan to take the kids on a quick trip to my parents 5 hours north east from our house for the weekend.  My husband was in the field about 4 hours west of home he has about a week or so left in his harvest for this season. Friday the kids had an early release due to homecoming parade so I had the car all packed and ready to go other than a few things including my purse. I went to put out the dogs three days worth food and water to ensure he would be fine when we were gone. I went back in the house grabbed my water and phone and locked the door behind me!  I got about a mile down the road and checked to make sure I had my purse with the checks my husband needed me to put in the business bank account before leaving town.  I turned around and came home to find that the key for the house was on the keychain in the house!  I only had 15 mins to get to the kids about 12miles away so I took off for town at that point calling my husband in a panic because I knew the other set of keys was with him 4 hours the opposite direction of where I wanted to be for the weekend. Long story short I finally called the neighbor over and he broke in one of our windows on the second floor that was the easiest one to get in.
   After a successful drive to my parents we had a restful night. Up near Duluth Minnesota this time of year you get fog but this weekend it was very heavy fog but still so peaceful in the Northwoods.   I was hoping to get to see the beautiful colors of the leaves changing but the trees were just starting to change.  Saturday my oldest and I took a road trip over to Wisconsin to meet my dear friends baby.  This was such a fun trip as we did a lot of talking and just enjoying each other.  She is 12 and really struggling with friends and what all comes with friend ships at that age as classmates are starting to take hold of values or the lack of values that they have been given by the people they are around.  During our conversation I took a wrong tune. My daughter said we were not lost just a little off track because I did know the area well.  It made me think of life how often we feel lost but really we know the way back to where we belong it just takes us longer to get there.  In the extra time I got to see my daughter  realize that I was not a perfect teen but also that the mistakes I made were not that bad and she learned the things in life I regret like spending so much time worried about who would like me and not enjoying more time with the people that enjoied being in my life.  Do I still look at life this way or do I truly trust that the Lord has placed the people around me for today and not stress about if they truly care about who I am r do I just trust that they are part of my day because we have a reason to be there at that time and place for a reason.  Once we made the trip back to my parents we enjoyed the day with family .
  We left Sunday for the usually easy
4.5hr drive. First we spend sometime driving around a local small town waiting for a phone call back to see if we could see someone in my planned weekend. Once again My plan was not right I was driving by on of the churches when I saw a friends mom whom had lost my friends sister just less than than a year ago.  My kids were already getting cranky about waisting time but I needed to stop and so I had a short visit with her in the parking lot of her church we talked about the loss as my family lost my sister in 1998 so I wanted her to know that they are still on my mind and in my prayers as the hurt doesn't stop after the funeral.
 Now the kids were beyond ready to just get on the road as they had plans for when they got home.  We did have another talk about being there for those that need you in a time of need weather it is in our plan or not and what is truly more important the 5mins I visited with my friends mom or the 5 mins they wanted to do something that would wait for them a week if they didn't get to it right then.
 One more stop at my in-laws to get some meat from the steer they butchered a few weeks ago and we were on the road.  My thought at that point we that we will be home plenty early as we did't visit the people I was hoping to in town and we had plenty of snacks to make it with very few stops along the way.
  About 55mins from the time we left my in-laws we were on the busiest stretch of road on our route home.  The rumble was not a rumble of the rumble strip but that of a flat tire so we pulled off on the first available side road and sure enough it was completely flat.  It is in these moments I am so glad that my dad made sure us girls knew how to change a flat tire. I watched as  cars and trucks would go by as I was unloading the truck of the car to the back seat then took the donut and jack out of the back . I watched as two guys and a lady were looking at a car for sale just up the road and I and the kids got the longest off the bolts and the tire jacked up when a couple  that had just moved from North Dakota stopped to help.  I know I can change a tire but I always fear that I will not get the lugs back on tight enough. I am just very grateful for this kind couple that stopped and was willing to change their plan to make a difference for someone else.

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

To Be Delighted In and To Delight in Others

Why do we feel we need to be delighted in?  Who ever told us that we had to be loved by others?  The Past few months I have been seeing a Christian councilor for some life stuff.  I struggle with not having the people I love give me unconditional love when I want them to do something different before I will change who I am.  The past month I took some time, lots of time to really reconnect with who I am, also what makes me love me and what makes me feel like I am fearfully and wonderfully  made with a purpose.

    Why do I look to others when this is what God is for?   If I look in his word we see so many times that he is our true rock, that he promises never to leave or forsake us.  What is it that makes us long for others to delight in us this is also in his word.    In over 20 verses it talks about fellowship with one another, that does that mean we love the time we spend together.  No, not every time we gather will it be joy filled but God wants us to love one another.    On Sunday the pastor preached from the pulpit on John 8:1-11 the story of the adulterous woman and I love John 8:7 in particular.

John 8:1-11 (ESV)but Jesus went to the Mount of Olives. Early in the morning he came again to the temple. All the people came to him, and he sat down and taught them. The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery, and placing her in the midst they said to him, “Teacher, this woman has been caught in the act of adultery.Now in the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?”This they said to test him, that they might have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground. And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.” And once more he bent down and wrote on the ground. But when they heard it, they went away one by one, beginning with the older ones, and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him. 10 Jesus stood up and said to her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” 11 She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more.”]]

I try to live that one out as much as possible. I remember one day on the school bus in late elementary school  the boys were picking on a heavy set girl and I turned around and gave them a lecture on how God loves her too and that they have faults as well they just aren't as noticeable from the outside.   Why is it even in adulthood we still feel as though some people treat us like we are back on the school bus.  They laugh and point out all our flaws but they forget to look at themselves first. How come we forget to look at others and ourselves as God has asked us to?  I ask you to take some time today and read passages on who you are in God.  Then take time to look at the people around you and see who they are in Gods eyes they grew up in a broken home with no true sense of love.   How can we then ask them to know how to love us?   Are we strong enough in the Lord to step up and pour Christ's love out of us and onto them even if it hurts?

Thursday, June 25, 2015

RESPECT This is tough stuff

  Who knew what we are supposed to do I got married at a very young age.  I attended a great moms group with awesome friends that taught me what respect and submissions were and being very much a rule follower I took it to the extreme. Every step of the way I would check with my husband before doing anything. In the past few years I have come to realize that I can be reaspectfull with out needing his permission. We have a budget set up this gives me the guidelines of what I can spend then how I spend it with in that is my choice.  Time is another thing that I am still working on. I used to feel that I needed to ask permission to take the kids and do anything with them now I am learning that I can manage my time and money together to be able to get more of the things I want to do done.   I can do these things without bothering my husband and that in turn relieves him stress when he is trying to work.  I am learning that at 32 I can do things on my own and still be there as a wife and in time I pray he sees this as a benefit for him as well.

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Is my God Bigger?

   Well the Lord has been speaking louder today and he is asking really what would you do for me. Charleston has changed me thousands of miles away and no one I know is there but still it changes how I am thinking today.
   I could be persuaded here in my home church. I could be killed in my car, I could die at any time for any reason so why does this question come so often. Do I follow the call to Ukraine?
   I have been to Ukraine and feel that family is there not through earthly blood but through a stronger blood the blood of my saviour.  What is sacrifice? What is persecution? Am I unwilling to go back?  What God asks is impossible no but out of fear there is doubt. Do I not have a bigger God than my doubts? I have struggled with this question several times since Christmas day. Who are we to say NO?

Friday, June 19, 2015

Why is it so hard.

Oh Lord help me today I do think I will make it through motherhood let alone being a wife.  I have been tired and feeling alone for a week or more now running the kids here and there. I am not sportsman nor a mom that believes in my kids being involved in everything. How do I show the importance of a kid being a kid running and playing in the woods will build so much more knowledge and team building than a little league game where parents are yelling at an 8 year old to "move your lazy but or he will not play again.". This is not how I feel my children should view team work or parenting. I want them to know team work comes from hard work and planning a tree fort and accomplishing the plan with others even if it's just their siblings.
  Today it is our at home day the only one all week and my kids chose to watch tv and play mindcraft but at least now they play together and drew out a plan for the world they create.  Why then do I hate being here hate just cleaning after everyone over and over each day. It's the same old thing and I want change if you can't tell I am very much an extrovert but everything biblical says I am to cook and clean but I am not ok with that I want more. What am I to do to make sure I don't go crazy in this thing called biblical woman hood? I listen to sermons and read my bible but all I get is guilt. This is why it has been months since I have posted here.

Thursday, April 2, 2015

Christ in Easter

So after taking a week off for our trip I have spent the last two trying to just catch up.
   April is now here and I missed a whole month of posts but to be honest I think I needed that time too catch up on some heart issues.  What is my heart saying that is most important in live.  Tonight I was asked that very thing. What is the priority list for life. To me it's easy family ,work then others. I know it should be the Lord, Family, and work others or even switch the last two.  So why then do I struggle so much? 
   The past few weeks these seem to be overwhelming to keep in place. But just yesterday I realized that this Easter I want different. I want to be Christ centered relaxed an at home with just the five of us.  How are we going to do that? I am still not sure. 
   I want my kids that are now 12, 10, 2 weeks away 8 to have a part in how and why we will do what we do.  
   If you have any suggestions please feel free to let me know them. I love any advice on this one.
Hope you have a blessed Easter.

Saturday, March 21, 2015

To model is the best way to teach.

Natural Bridge Caverns

A little update we are 12 hrs from home nearing the end of great family road trip.  We had the privilege of celebrating my in-laws 50th wedding anniversary with an extended family trip to Texas. We are so blessed to have had a chance to sit back and share memories from the past.
    For me my in-laws have been the models of a Christian family.  The first time I was ever laid hands on to pray was at their home when I was 19.  I came from a church going family but my faith has been brought to a whole new level by the witness of who my in-laws are and the beliefs they have.
       This past week was a blast as when we were in Texas our oldest turned 12yrs old and all 17 of us enjoyed a day at Six flags Fiesta. My father-in-law loves trains so we spent some time at a small train museum, antiques with my mother in-law and spent some time exploring the Natural Bridge Caverns. 
   To model is the best way to teach!

Monday, March 9, 2015

Making wise purchases!

 In Proverbs 31:16 we read  "She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard."   
     This post has me thinking a little more about what we in our modern world are expected to do.  I look at it as be intentional about what we seek to buy. I really want a Kindle Fire but I am only taking $50 a month for my allowance each month and I use that to go on dates with the kids and have not saved it up for a Kindle.  Maybe some of you don't have an allowance but you buy things whenever you want. How then can we change our way of spending?
     I love the activity that our 7th grade class does each fall. The teacher gives them each a dollar to see how they can invest it for a profit. Some sell lemonade each fall. The teacher gives them each a dollar to see how they can invest it for a profit. Some sell lemonade, cotton candy, cookies, cupcakes and all the money in the end goes to the local charity.  
     I think about that and how would I do this project? I was just watching some videos on thrift store buying to sell on Ebay, I have sold baked goods before but as a wife what would be  a good investment  for my time?   would I turn around and put the money I earn into something productive?  These are all things I must think about as I look at the options. I drive around town and see houses for sale and it makes me think of a lady that buys houses fixeshouses fixes them up and rents them out. She has done most of the work  herself on these houses. Would that be a good thing for me to do? No, I am not interested in that line of earning money.  I have thought of having some kids at my house but out of respect for my husband that will not happen either.  These are just a few ways to make extra money to spend on the not so nicety or even add to a spend down budget.
     Please let me know if you have any other ideas.

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

Yummy Homemade Granola Recipe

   Today I am trying to regroup on this months plan.  Hurray for a snow day!!  Yes, come the day after Easter I may not be so glad we have to make the day of school up.   Today I am going to rejoice in getting caught up on things I didn't get done over the weekend with company here.  I have made granola (five batches of the recipe below), had the kitchen cleaned once, finished a blog post on my who he is today blog, laundry is continuing, and I am getting caught up here.

     When we set up goals as a couple for our household our financial goal for the year is to stay on the cash envelope system.  My first goal is to stay in the weekly budget each week.  We do this by having it broke down into a weekly plan with the budgeted amounts and a place to write in the actual amount spent.  I withdrew the months' amount but this month I withdrew less cash than the budgeted amount because I had forgotten the envelopes when we had to get fuel so I took the $ from my fuel last month and put it away to be used in this months budget(this is not recommended).

    On Sunday night  I put enough for the week in each envelope and then the rest goes in a drawer for the other weeks.  Today is the third of March and I already spent $150 of the first weeks $200 budget much of this is because we purchased sale items for our family vacation this month in hopes to make homemade granola bars, trail mix, cookies, and more travel snacks.  One of the biggest expense in groceries can be cereal out of a box. Here is how we make our granola. (I wish I did it more often!)

Granola recipe!!
Here is what you need * Paleo substitute:
Large bowl
4c. Oatmeal (we use old fashion)
1c. Bran * leave out
1c. wheat germ *Ground Flax seed
 The optional things we put in.
1/2 cup cashews
1c. almonds
2.TBS cinnamon
1c. coconut

1/2c. honey
1/4c. Brown sugar *agave
1/4c. coconut oil (my oil of choice)
2 tsp. of vanilla

Mix the top section of ingredients into the large bowl. I use as much of these as I have on hand, if not I will up one of the other ingredients to make it work.
On the stove melt the honey, brown sugar, & oil. Once they are melted together add the vanilla.  Bake in large pan, I use my roster pan but I also double or triple the batch each time.  Bake at 350 degrees for 15 mins then stir and then stir every 5-10 mins for 45mins or until the oats are a toasted brown color.   Make sure you get the stuff on the bottom and sides mixed in well each time you stir it. Turn off oven and let cool, once cooled put in airtight container.

Coconut oil

Rise and Shine

  I am not good at getting up and getting stuff done when it's cold out and I can lay in bed and cuddle with my husband or kids.  To get up and start the day out right seems so hard.   I know the days I get up before the alarm goes off get my bible and cappuccino are the days that go so much better.   The days I prayerfully and diligently put my focus on God are the best days the most uplifting days I have.

   So why is it that that doesn't become a habit for me? Do I not want to have a God centered day each day?  Of course I do, we all as Christians want to walk in his will & be in his plan.   We struggle with this as well.   It is just to know that it only takes a half-hour to make a huge difference.  I have it in my schedule but it is the first thing that gets over looked because it is not something we can't miss like a shower.   If I miss my shower everyone knows because my hair is very oily.   If I miss breakfast it's pointless to be at work at  9:00 I am shot if i do not have a full stomach because my mind is thinking about food.  If I miss my devotional time no one else can tell or connect the dots that that is what is missing.   It's easy to step over that line and say oh I will make sure I do it tomorrow morning and then you repeat that statement each day.

   In the past few months I have actually pulled my bible up at my lunch brake after all the other staff is back in the classroom.   I can have a quit time then if at no other time I have learned to cherish this time with God in the midst of my busy day.

   Do I make it a point to stay up late? No not at all if you ask my family they will tell you that after 6:00 it's not the best time for me.   I really have tried hard to work on this aspect as my husband is a night person.  I am also working on making sure supper things are put away, maybe not all the dishes done yet but I am hoping to get there.

    Does this mean that I am not a Godly wife?  To some people yes but I think that as long as I have not given up on trying to improve myself it is not ungodly.   I do think that my decision to give up reading novels for pleasure at home only reading one if we have a vacation is a huge thing for me.  I have chosen to replace them with helpful biblical budgeting and homemaker books or blogs.   I know this time would be better used to do my homemaking but I only read in the car or in bed before I go to sleep.   I also have taken inventory of the time I spend on my phone for games and other leisure items.

    I have also made it a point to intentionally step up to what makes my husband feel loved.   Even if I am upset I have to put aside my anger and make him the meal or cleaning up his dirty clothes for the fifth time this week.   It's not about how others effect my day but how I choose to make my day for me.   Today had a rough start and was letting it bring me down until I remembered that I can choose to change it.

   I love this blog post by  I felt like it was right out of my mind this January if this is where you are don't feel alone.  I have created this blog to be completely honest and open so that we know we are not alone in our walk as a biblical wife.

Dear Lord,
  Help me to put you first and walk in your will as a wife and mother.  I stumble on my own and I need you to hold me up. Lord let your spirit fill me that I will long to know what you have for me each morning may I look at what you give me in your love letter for me. Help me to pull it out and read it over and over as if it was a note from a high school crush that was so creased that I can no longer read all of it due to the use it had on an every day basis. Lord help me long for you early in the morning and all day long.
In your son Jesus name Truly Truly Amen

Friday, February 27, 2015

Slow cooked to perfection!

    Are we the modern wife of fast and easy or do you get filled with the joy of putting together a extravagant well planned meal?  As I dig deeper into Proverbs 31:14 my convictions came rolling up.  Meals  I am so the modern wife that would love to order out every day.  I am not sure about you but I hate the dishes!!
    In my studying up on this verse I was reading a few articles and the Let God Be True was a perspective I had not thought of before.  I thought of a wife that went out much like in verse 13 that watched how she spent the money and watched her budget.  Reading this article I was convicted with being a wife that holds joy in keeping a house and not needing material wants.  I have to admit this was very convicting to the point I was not sure I wanted to post on this verse.  My love language is not acts of service I am a quality time and words of affirmation person.  With that said to make a meal and have nagging children refuse to eat it after working hours on it doesn't bring me much joy.  I would much rather have a game day with pizza and games with my family.  Does this mean I am not biblical or doomed I don't think so.  This verse can be taken in some many ways but to me it is doing what makes your husband feel that his needs are met with the foods you provided him with.
    I do feel that it is important to make sure I try to cook as healthy as possible and this is why we try to do as much food from scratch as possible in my baking.  I LOVE MY CROCKPOT!!  If you come to my house there is a 75% chance the main part of the meal comes out of the crockpot.  This allows me to have time with my family, work and still get good food for supper.  Plus it is minimal cleaning if I only have one pot to clean up after.   We do have some premixed  mixes made at home to make homemade quick meals.  I am working on getting homemade hamburger helper mixes as well my kids love these basic recipes. I also do a lot of freezer meals as a working mom and a crockpot lover this works wonders for me and one day I can make a mess browning hamburger and mixing bowls then I don't have to dirty that much through out the weeks to come.  I try to get two meals a week done and put in the freezer the second Saturday of the month. This doesn't get done that often but this would be what I try to do. I can't come here today and tell you that I do any of this perfect but I hope that you gain hope in knowing that you are not alone in imperfections of life's busyness.  May God have us in his crockpot to make us perfect sometimes we may be on high and others he will allow the low heat on us.

Dear Lord,
Today I ask that you help me be a wife that honors who you made me to be by serving my family in the best way I know how. Lord help me to feel the convictions you give me and help me want to change to be the wife you want me to be.  Help me to plan my day with my priorities in your line of importance. Lord help fill me with your spirit that I may have eyes to see what you want done each day.
In Jesus Name Truly Truly Amen,

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Budgeting is the Proverbs 31:13 in our modern day!

   Not many of us work with wool and flex anymore but we do have other ways of making sure we have clothing for our family.  Each of us has a different way of doing this but this post is mainly about my clothing budget.  I hope you can see how clothing can be bought on a very minimum budget when necessary.
   On my One Wife's Walk blog I have some more on our family budget.  I am going to take that one step deeper on the clothing aspect of that budget here.  First of all our kids get up to $6 a week each for allowance a portion of that goes to savings 10%, tithing10%, clothing 40%(until they have $100 than it can go to the following) treats/food 20% fun 20%.  They will buy the clothing they want out of that fund. Our oldest loves the thrift stores, our second child gets her  cloths from her older sister and our son inharets is older cousins clothes so each of the kids could get by without spending anything on clothes if they want to.  They get necessities from christmas and birthdays like socks and undergarments.
    My husband gets his clothing restocked in the summer.   I will get him 2-3 new pairs of jeans and a few T-shirts for good socks and any other necessities.  His old good clothing then becomes work clothes for the harvest season and through the year.
    I have a casual/dress dress-code for work.  HOW DO I DO THIS ON $100/yr!  I get my slacks and tops at the local thrift or consignment  shop where I find almost new clothes all the time I got a sweater with the tag still on that said $50 for $5 or $6. Our consignment shop has three dates each followed with a price on them starting usually with a month or two from drop off than a few months from that down to about 6 months from drop off and if I find one with the last date that is 2-3months old it is usually down even farther.  I purchase my clothes at the lowest price they will give I never buy the top two price on the tag.  My shoes I will buy there also if I can find them but I have a harder time being I have big feet.  If I order shoes it is usually a BOGO sale.  
  This takes extra planning and making sure when I purchase something it will be able to mix and match with different clothes and seasons.  We also wear our clothes out.  I have a pair of pants I have had for 15years WOW thats crazy but I know I had them for an event in high school and wear them to work last week.  My husband still wears the shirt he wore on our first date one and a great while if he is getting really dressed up.  The kids clothes we pass on because most of it we get for free so we give back by handing them to the next family to wear.
   I will admit I am not the best at staying on top of laundry or house work and I don't keep busy hands as much as I should or in the way some might think I should but I hope to please God and my husband by being the best stewed of what they have given me each day.  Please feel free to leave your comments below to help share Ideas of how we can pick out the best wool and flex for our families.

Dear Lord Help us to make sure we are using all you have given us to the best of our abilities. Help us as wives to make sure we do not foolishly impulse buy clothing that is unnecessary and not helpful to the bettering of our family.  Help us to keep what we have in proper working fashion each day to the best of our abilities as well. Lord use others to teach us how we can make the most of what you give us each day.
In Jesus name Truly Truly Amen.

It's all about the budget!

  Let's talk money!
    This used to be my most dreaded thing in adult life. We have now been doing the cash envelope system from Dave Ramsey for the past three months. In this time I have learned so much about what we have been doing with our money.
 Our budget for the month looks something like this.

WOW yes that's what I said too but here we will look at how we stay on budget.
Clothing is one that I really love to do it's a fun challenge. I have learned that if I buy my clothes at the consignment shop or thrift stores. I have learned that our local consignment has three dates and each one has a price with it. Along with that if the last date is a month or more out there is additional savings.  Our kids clothes come out of their allowance which has made our house run much more smooth with the kids all having jobs to do.  Even if it is just the cat and dog and their rooms.  They have a mother chart to fill in for extra chores they do around the house.  They have 5 categories they put their allowance in each week savings, tithing, clothes, food/treats, and Fun (toys or extra activities )  Our budget works out to be $150 for me a year and 150 for my husbands clothes a year and $300 for outer wear which I rotate who needs new outer wear each year.  So My Husband got new snow stuff this year next year the kids will and I will the following year.  We also get hand me downs here along with some great thrift store finds as much as possible.
 Food is a huge part of our house hold budget that runs smooth if I have the planning put into it like I should.  I run a menu plan that goes Crockpot or campfire/BBQ grill Sunday, beef on Monday, Chicken Tuesday, Breakfast Wednesday, Pork on Thursday, Friday pizza, Saturday is soup in the winter and make your own/leftovers in the summer.   We get about 75% of our beef homegrown and split two pigs with the neighbors so that is all the pork we need for a year.  I would love to get garden produce so we are working on plans for a garden at our house this summer. (I head one at our old house)  I am learning to coupon slowly and that is helping out too.  I buy my flour and oatmeal in bulk and any other dry baking goods possible from Country Life Natural Foods. I will store it in totes in my pantry and make premixed pancake and waffle mix to save on these Items from the store.  I like to get produce from Bountiful Basket if possible in our schedule.  I get coconut oil from Bountiful Baskets whenever it is available. I use the jars from it to store bulk backing goods in after too.
 Our mortgage is a 5yr loan and we have it only taken out of my check so the $920 is put in savings for the year.  Part of the $920 is pulled out each month but because I only work 9 months we budgeted that to be covered by my income and thats all I work for.   Once that is done I can retire right? :)   Fuel for our vehicles is one area that we have to keep track of as well as we try to make sure we are not on the road more than we need to each day.
   The rest of the Budget is our monthly bills or money we move to savings for annual, by annual or quarterly bills.
   If you have any questions on this please feel free to ask. If you have any of your own advice please feel free to share it in a comment below.

Sunday, February 22, 2015

Do we honor him?

   I truly think for me verses 11,12 & 23 are the hardest to keep on top of as a Proverbs 31 Wife.  In a society that doesn't speak well of men this is easy to get caught up in each day I have to think about what I am doing to bring good and not harm to my husband.  
   I now work outside the home and this brings on new challenges.   Will I be God honoring each day?  The same goes for in the house.  Am I someone I want my girls to be as they grow up to be wives?  Not at this point but I am working on it each day.  I struggle to keep up on someday to day things due to my own thoughts and perceptions on how my life should be.  I wanted to be my husbands princess not a helpmate. I am learning that I was brought up with a societal view not a biblical view.

  What does it mean to truly be the wife my husband needs me to be?  I must hold high the ability to guard against negative thoughts toward him.  If I can hold my thoughts in a positive place where does my heart and tongue go, they fallow on my thoughts.  I have struggled with my husband being gone 6-12 weeks a year each summer through fall with this my mind takes control of my tongue and heart I find myself quickly sliding into the lonely corners of my depression.  I am learning with the help of others that the holy spirit is the only thing that can truly put my thoughts where they should be  and that is on how blessed I am to have an amazing husband that works hard for our family.  I still struggle with his work taking him away but I have to remember that he doesn't make me who I am. That is all on my shoulders so that I can rely on God and not my husband.  I do have to stay very Christ centered in the months he is gone in order to stay worthy of him feeling that I bring him good each day. I can choose to be the nagging wife in Proverbs that is like the dripping water that drives him crazy if I don't watch myself. 

   This past fall was the worst of it and I was at a complete melting point. I felt as if his work was pulling our marriage and family apart we have since put some plans in place to help us stay connected in his busy  seasons. If we as a couple don't communicate with each other on a even tone we find that we are not honoring each other or God. Our first role as a wife is to honor God then our spouse, yes there are times I will have to make a choice of which one it will be. Although I struggle with this all day as we all do I must remember that each day is new with new mercies for each of us.

Dear Lord, I thank you for the mercy you bring to me each day that I can start fresh with my service to you.  I look at each new day as a gift you have given me to minister to my husband and family in only a way that I can with your help and loving hand in my life.  Lord I pray today that you touch my home and those I am with, with your love for them. 
In Jesus name Truly Truly Amen, 

Saturday, February 21, 2015

Organizing my Day :)

   Saturday is a huge day for me in my organization and planning.   This week has more than usual knowing that we have company coming next weekend the final Saturday of February.   Lets take a look at what I have in-store for today!
  I set up my daily plan in two types The days I work and the days I am home. From I filled it in with what I wanted added to it and here is what I got!

This is how my day typically looks if  know something is going to happen I will note it in the notes.  When I added this to my Day Runner I printed it in B&W cut them, laminated them back to back and three hole punched them and stuck it in my today section. That way if I am not sure what I should be doing then I can just flip it open and see,  I also laminated it and posted it on the fridge.  Remember: I am just starting this plan so I still need reminders everywhere to keep me on task.

 In my planning for today I have to think about the whole month of March. March may be thrown off some with our first family vacation on the cash budget.  I have the trip itemized out on paper but that means that I have a lot more food prep with trying to do homemade traveling snacks.   I am looking at doing that in my posts the first week of March.

   I am looking at my menu plan for the month using a meal planning template  I didn't want anything detailed here as I usually only plan the meals we are home for.   I cropped it down to just the image, printed it two to a page and laminated one of them to the front of my grocery list then I added it to put in my menu part of my planner.

   Today during my down time with the kids we made donut muffins!

    I love the Fly Lady but feel overwhelmed by her a lot of the time so I took her ideas and try to incorporate what she has to offer to my planner as well as you can see above in the daily plan that I try to shine my sink daily and get dressed from head to toe every day.  I also keep my bible study sheets in the today section these are one of the few things in my planner not laminated for easy permanent writing in.   These are simple things that make me a better wife and not forget to drink water (I am sipping on a pop) But days I have pop I try to drink three times as much water at a minimum.

Happy organizing will make your walk as a wife a lot easier.

Friday, February 20, 2015

Trust Worthy Not Perfection

    He has total trust in me. Oh my can it really be?  I struggled with this for a very long time. I really didn't want all that it meant.  My husband felt just fine when he left me with the kids and the house as he traveled each year for harvest. In 2009 this was an extremely hard place for me to be as the harvesting  season kept him from home for 123 days but who was counting right?
   For me every new challenge that came in that year I would cry out to God saying," Why are you teaching me this!" I remember having the fear of what was to come with the new skills I was forced
 to learn that year.  We have all been in a place of fear before.  It may be just not knowing directions to somewhere you need to get or fear of not knowing how a job interview will go. All these fears are only because we carry the load alone, we forget that God is more than in control of every step in our life.

   My husband kept telling me it was ok he had 100% confidence in me in 2009.  Without that I would have struggled even more that year.  I still don't know the purpose of all the Lord had taught me in that year other than I am more capable than I ever thought I could be.
  This year I am working on renewing my own knowledge that I am capable to do whatever lays ahead of me as long as I remember that God is my strength and courage.  When I feel no one else thinks I should have to, or that they could never make it in my situation. I realize that this is the life God gave me as a wife to strengthen my walk with him. 
  We all have things that we are to do to make ourselves trust worthy towards our spouse each household is different; my husband likes to know that I can stick to our budget and that we have food on the table that is eatable (I cook but am not a chef). He prefers our house be livable(I am not a maid) yes, he has learned to be very basic with me as a wife. 
  Remember you don't need to be perfect for your husband to feel 100% confident in you.  I didn't always believe him when I felt so beat down by my mind or Satan's whispers in my ear.  We as woman put our expectations so high but God and our husbands just need use to be trust worthy with what they give us.

Dear Lord,
I thank you for all you give me to do today; that I can use it to honor my husband in the way you long for me to do.  Lord I have not always remembered to serve you by serving my husband so help me to see what actions I can do to serve you and my husband today and in the days to come. 
In your son Jesus Christ Truly Truly Amen

Tuesday, February 17, 2015


OK so It's time to look at my Day Runner :) I put it all together and I love the way it turned out so here we go! Remember I am trying to be as budget wise as possible and that is one reason I am doing the Planner.

  I used My favorite scrapbook paper cut to size on my paper cutter (I have had since 2003 that I got at Walmart then). Take any colorful pens that kinda matched the paper I used.  You could use a Laminator that holds Scotch-Thermal-Laminating-100-Pack like the one I borrowed from my neighbor.  (she has a lot of cool gadgets I don't have yet!) and a three ring hole punch that you can just the hole punches on because planners all come with different hole punches.  My third hole punch was not working so I had to punch the top and middle flip it over and line up the middle and punch the bottom hole whail repenting the middle hole I need a new three hole punch.
 I did dividers with categories I chose and wrote on the tabs before I laminated the dividers. My Today section which at this point only has my daily bible study notes in it because I want to laminate my today to do list sheet but I am not sure what PDF I have that I want to use on it!  Then I have GOALS  this one is at the front because it is a reminder that I want to see often It has my 1yr, 5yr and 10yr goals I made with my husband that is a key part of how all this became about.  Then I have a weekly planning section that I have a place for each of the other members in the families activities and a menu for each day.  My monthly section at this point are the basic monthly pages that came with the day planner that I look at to fill out the weekly planner part. I already put our March family trip in the February section. I guess I was just excited to go somewhere warm.  My yearly section has a page that I list out all of our family birthdays and anniversaries on so that I can plug them into the monthly plans.  This all sounds very repetitive but it has really helped me stay on top of life the last few months.  I also have a laminated version of the years calendar so that I can quick glance to see what days weddings may fall if I have bookings and cross off the days I have booked for family or work.  

     The budget part of the planner has become one of my favorite things the past few months. I look at it as a challenge and game I have to try to win in the days each month allows or a puzzle of money to put together and I will look at how I have been doing that in a future post. The Menu has been another great section I love I have a list of our families favorite meals decided into Beef, Pork, Chicken, Soups, Lunch foods, and Breakfast this makes menu planning easy as I try to do one night of each meat and a soup Saturday or Sunday. Friday is usually Pizza other than on days that got crazy like today so I will switch tonight and Friday nights meals.  The kids and I eat at school for Lunch and my husband has the left overs or sandwiches for his lunch at work.

Worth More Then Jewels

    There are many days I don't feel like I am worth much more than an agate to my husband. But then lets look at what this passage meant back in biblical times.  In the Jewish culture of that time women were looked at with very low value. They were not trusted to be in charge of any financial decisions.  Let alone valued as a prized gem! 
 In some translations of this passage it is described that she is the value of rubies. Me not being a jewelry girl I took some time researching the value of a fine ruby. Yes I have seen the lists of all the jobs a mom does and how underpaid a stay at home mom is but that's not even close to the price of some of the rubies I looked at.  To think I can be of that value to my husband is amazing.
    I think back over my 12.5 years of marriage and think of times that I felt like I might live up to being a tiny speck of a jewel but then there are times I felt like nothing more than dust off the fan blade in the living room that should have been cleaned months ago. But then there are times that I feel like God has given me the ability to be the wife my husband looks at and thinks I am a Jewel!  
    Over the next few weeks I want to dissect the Proverbs 31 Woman for me to know the true value  God wants me to have as a wife and to put aside the negative value society puts on a biblical wife.  I hope to grow in my ability to be the wife God longs for me to be and that my husband desires of me so come along and walk through Proverbs 31 with me. 

      Lord help us wives to come to know the awesome worth you put on us and Lord help us not to feel overwhelmed by the roles you have given us but to feel blessed to serve you and our families as you want us to. Lord I thank you for each person reading this today that you bless their home with your loving arms and peace as we dig deeper into in to the Proverbs 31 woman. 
In your son Jesus Christ Truly Truly Amen.

Saturday, February 14, 2015

What Christ has taught!

 In the past three months I have been touched again by what the lord has asked of me as I look into being a better wife and mom I realize it comes to my walk with him and who he is!

In Adult Sunday school we were doing Dave Ramsey Total Money Makeover and God really spoke to me in how I managed the money my husband works hard to earn. With that we are working on the cash envelope system and I talk more about that in a post on my new blog that I am moving to as the less personal and less on my photography but helpful to wives to keep things organized and on the task together. The new blog is found at honestyofawife!  I also have my goals for the year there I hope to keep this one up to date and link the two together as I take this walk.

  The past few weeks we started a new bible study by Kyle Idleman this has been digging deep as I try to keep up on my daily homework to keep my head in the game of life with real christ centered teaching day to day.  This is a huge struggle but I find that each day I do it is easier and my day is more Christ centered and less me centered.  In the past few months I have also had great council on my role as a Christ centered wife do I do it daily no I often stumble but I get up each morning with a new grace from God on life that only he can give.

  Where do you struggle and want to run from?
      I was on the verge of starting over on everything I felt so overwhelmed with all that was on my plate this past fall.  Finically we didn't have a plan so I would emotionally spend and then I would get mad because we didn't have the funds that I wanted and God provided the class I needed.  Then we got the budget inline. When I lest expected God said you are walking on the heals of everyone else's faith.  He moved my closest friend to a church an hour away from me (yes I cried) not just because I would miss her but I knew God had something big to work on in my life.  Now I sit here and think if I would have ran from what I was running from I would have missed the growth he has for me that is just beginning and has a long way to go.

Starting Over Again

   I am not an organized person nor am I one that loves to keep a clean house but over the past 12.5yrs. I have realized this is something my husband needs me to do.  In the past few months I have been trying to reboot and become more organized and hope that that will lead to a cleaner home in the long run.   I look into blogging to help me be accountable to both myself and my followers.

  My top three goals for February 2015:
  1. Start a blog on household management to better my marriage.
  2. Continue staying on my cash envelope budget plan.
  3. Make a planner to help me stay on top of life.

  So to start the blog I have been reading on blogging here is My first read on blogging!  I love to get informed and there are so many places to read on this topic so check out some of my favorite spots. I will list my favorites at the bottom of this post. I chose Blogger over other sites for my blog because of the ease of it I have a personal blog on blogger that I have posted on and off on for years.  I like to stick with what is simple and familiar to me. If I am going to take time out of my life as a wife mom and full-time paraprofessional I need a place that is quick and easy.

   OH HOW I LOVE MY CASH ENVELOPE SYSTEM!! We recently did the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University and we have done this before but it is much more near and dear to our life style now.  We just purchased a fixer up house and we were not following the Dave Ramsey budget but now that we have we put the updates on hold for a while and started back at the Total Money Makeover I do a budget review each week to make sure we are on track.  We have been on the budget for the past three months and it is working well.  I was so blessed with a daughter that can sew and she made me a Budget envelope wallet and it makes it so doable compared to the paper ones that fell apart right away.  Here is the pattern she used to make my envelope wallet!

  Organizing my life is a huge goal for the year of 2015!! This is going to be the most difficult of the three for me because that means there will be a daily commitment to follow through on this.  If I am going to be 100% honest I struggle with accountability to myself. I know that it will come with great rewards but It seems so hard to follow through on every day.
  The first step I took on this was looking through apps for my phone in this technological world I wanted to have it all at my fingertips to work on whenever I wanted.  I tried about 10 different apps but I did't like any of them for my purpose.  I looked online and found the home binder system and loved it for a month!  I wanted to work on it on my break at work and it was so big and bulky so I am currently waiting for my Day-Runner to come on Monday.  Then I can set it all up but I spent a part of the day yesterday laminating my devisors and thepages I wanted laminated.  Thanks to my great neighbor for loaning me her laminator.  I will be following up with posts on my Day Runner next week when I have it all put together to show the step by step of how it is done.

 My other goals for 2015 are to build my wedding photography business and learn to coupon. I will touch more on these subjects but for the month of February I will focus on the three I am targeting this month! Hope that I can be open an honest with my struggles and we can learn together what works and what doesn't work so please feel free to leave your comments below so that we can grow together to be the best wives and homemakers possible!